"Rose afghane"

One month ago a professor asked us to read the book of Frank Andriat untitled "Rose afghane". I was unhappy about it because in general I am not interested in the subjects like war or in the novels for teenagers. The book is composed of six chapters, one chapter tells one story. The stories are different but there is one point in common – the war in Afghanistan. However, this book picked my curiosity and I am glad to have read and learned some things that are described in this book, things I was not aware of, for example the brutality of the Taliban. During their reign girls could not study on the university. Or a person who was homosexual could be ran over with a military machine in the middle of the street.

But it is undeniable that this book is sad and I sometimes had tears in my eyes when I was reading it. The consciousness that they have lost of their family members, that they have to live in a foreign country with different customs is very sad, even if theoretically they are no longer in danger.

The subject of war is present in each history, because it constitutes the base of all these events. As war is a very difficult subject, situations that concern it are also difficult. There is a girl who knows that her mother is going to die and she can not even say goodbye, because every second is precious and her mother gave her life so that she and her brother could escape. For me, this situation is unimaginable and so sad. Then, the wars that took place in Afghanistan still allowed to be happy for its inhabitants, but the reign of the Taliban did not allow this. They were really violent. Afghans live in constant fear by not really knowing who is their enemy. There are suicide bombers everywhere, they blow up even during the wedding party just to hurt the most of people. Even children can have the bombs, because they are innocent and above suspicion. In Afghanistan there are violence, blood, bombs, gunpowder, the noise of airplanes that are constantly passing... Innocent civilians are killed and this is called collateral damage. Afghanistan is a minefield. The Taliban hate beauty, joy and love. However, there are some individuals that are capable of human behavior despite war and rivalry. For example, the Soviet soldier who took a little girl out of the street into her house with a big smile on his face. He didn't hurt her. Or another soldier who offered a chocolate bar to an Afghan girl.

In brief, I am very happy and grateful that someone made me discover this book which is really beautifully written. 

Interview with Jodi Picoult

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I have read the interview with one of my favourite novelist, Jodi Picoult. Bryony Gordon, the journalist presents her first meeting with Picoult.
The first part of the article contains her previous impressions about Jodi’s books. She thinks that the reading is long and easy, perfect for holiday. However, it turns out that her books deal with serious subjects like domestic violence, diseases, eugenics, the Holocaust, high-school shootings and many others.

The author of the article starts  with a description of their first meeting in a hotel. She feels miserable compared to Picoult who is a ball of fire. At the beginning, they talk about whether her books are really written only for women. Picoult explains that once she tried to write under a man’s pen name. Then, she was furious because she could not release her book. She heard that it was too well written for the male romance genre. She had the feeling of injustice because men who write about love are more appreciated and they feel special.

Even though the stories written by Picoult are indeed interesting, her real life is not so. Born in Long Island, she moved to New Hampshire when she was a teenager and she still lives there, with her husband and numerous domestic animals. She met her husband during her studies in Princeton. Her adventure with writing started when she was pregnant for the first time. When she already had 3 children and her career took off, her husband quit his job to help her. Now he is occupied with charity work and Picoult thinks that he is the kindest person she knows. She has also 3 children: a 19 year old daughter who is studying psychology and pedagogy, a 21 year old son who is a senior at Yale and also a lover of music, and her oldest homosexual child, who is a teacher at inner city schools and he is getting married to his boyfriend.Then, she gives her opinion about some sensible questions concerning the American society like abortion, gun control, gay rights or death penalty which are not always compatible with her liberal views. Finally, asked if she wanted to stay into a permanent book tour around the world, she answers that she did not want but she likes the benefits of having an American passport.
Usually, I read the books of this author and it's the first time I've read the interview with her and I'm happy that I could know her more and I saw that some aspect of her private life appear sometimes in her books.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/books/authors/jodi-picoult-its-really-hard-to-love-America-sometimes/

Spiritual retreat

The Ash Wednesday on 1st March began Lent. It's a very important time for Catholics. The time of concentration on the spiritual preparation to live the Resurrection, the biggest holiday for Christians in the best way. The three big questions which concern Lent are: feast, prayer and charity.

During the Lent, in all churches the priests organise the retreat.

Today retreat began in my parish. They will last to Wednesday. The priest have told us a story that can make you think about the participation in retreat. So, he always saw a family in the Church and during retreat there were never the father of this family. And one day, during the pastoral visit in their home, he asked this man why he was never present on retreat in church. The man told that he was just 40, he didn't need to go there and he would go to retreat when he would be old. Three days later, her wife went to the parish office to this priest. She told that she wanted to order a funeral. The priest was surprised and asked for whom would be the funeral. She responded that this would be her husband's funeral. It turned out that two days after the pastoral visit he has a strong heart attack and he died. He didn't have the possibility to participate in the retreat which are very important and can enrich the wait for Easter, but we can do it be happy of the fruits of it.

Raw food

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Today I was talking with my friend and I've heard about a trend in nutrition. Namely, about raw food, I had never heard about it before so I decided to check it. Maybe you also don't know what is it, so you can find out something new.

American stars are fans of this diet: Gwyneth Paltrow, Demi Moore, Georgia May Jagger, Drew Barrymore... The list of celebrities who have opted for the raw food diet is very long. Straight from the United States, this trend is gradually starting to take hold in Europe.

See what the amateurs of raw food eat. Freshly picked fruits and vegetables, sprouted seeds, oilseeds, cereals, cold pressed first oils. No dairy products, no salt, no added sugar, no animal foods. The rules are strict: water is allowed only outside meals, each lunch must start with a salad, dinner, it must start with a soup, tea and coffee are proscribed.The list of authorized foods is short, such as the cooking methods permitted by the diet. The "raw" prohibits any firing above 47.8 ° C. For according to the gurus of the diet, cooking at more than 48 ° C would destroy the vitamins and especially the enzymes present in fruits and vegetables. To cook the food, you have to equip yourself: dehydrator, blender, cold juice extractors or variable-temperature steamer.

This diet has some positif aspects but it doesn't give you all the substances that your body needs. Personally, I don't like this idea and it would be difficult for me to bear even one day eating in this way.

Emotion regulation

This week I participated on the next lecture named „The Zone Psyche” on the University of Social Sciences and Humanities. This time it was about emotions.I knew the theory of emotion regulation according to which there are 5 ways to deal with your emotions, in particular with negative ones. Imagine that you are in a room and you have to meet a person which you don't like.a) you can avoid this person and don't go to the second roomb) you can modify the situation, for example you can tell this person that he partsc) you can spread attention, you don't have contact with this person, you don't talk to, you don't interact but it is not pleasant for youd) you can try to change the opinion about this person, you can reinterprete the situation and tell you that maybe she is not so bad and you can take it, this situation demands a lot of emotional efforte) you can hold your reaction back, it means that you can't stand this person but you are talking to her, you smile and you pretend that everything is good, obviously, in this case your emotional effort is the biggest and this type of situation hurts youThis approach is represented by Gross and Thomas and I agree with it.

"The Newlyweds"

I’ve just finished to read „The Newlyweds” of Nell Freudenberger. I’m starting to miss about this lecture because it took me some time to read it. "The Newlyweds" has nearly 500 pages. Usually I don’t read the books about oriental culture but this time I made an exception and I’m happy for it.

This book is about Amina, 24 years old woman from Bangladesh who meets an American man on the portal dating. But it is not so romantic because the biggest aim of Amina is to have a good husband who can give her and her parents a possibility to live better, in the USA. She has to wait 3 years before receiving an American nationality. Then, she can invite her parents there. Despite of fact that Amina lives in America and she has everything, she is not happy. She has a challenge to live in a different culture. The book is long and it contains a lot of events from her and her parents’ life in America but also in Bangladesh.

We have also impression that she loves an ancient friend from childhood and she wants to quit everything in USA and live in Bangladesh with him.

The parents of Amina have big problems to receive a visa to the USA, but finally they have it. On the last pages of the book, we can read about how they leave Bangladesh and fly to America. For me these pages are extremely sad. It’s just a fiction, but how these poor people from the Orient will live in a completely different world ? Is it worth it ? I’d like to know how they would live in this new world.

I'm also wondering if there is still this desire from the part of the family so that woman has a good and rich husband. Because in this book they still choose a husband by different criteria. Or nowadays is it normal to marry someone who we love?

The reality In Bangladesh is strongly different than in Europe and it was interesting to find out something new. 

Harmful effects of television violence on children

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There are several reasons for which watching violent programs on televison can affect children's emotional well being. Firstly, children's fear can increase. It concernes especially girls who are more likely to be represented as victims of violence on television. Consequently, this can make them more fearful of the world around them. Next, children become desensitized towards violence in general. The aggressive acts are widely presented in some cartoons for children. Furthermore, violence is presented in a comical way and its real consequences are rarely exposed, the death is presented grotesquely and violence remains unpunished. As a result, children learn not to react to the evil and brutality. Finally, watching the drastic scenes can increase the likelihood of aggressive behavior, even with time deferred. A child develops the habit of aggressive response, which over time is difficult to change, in particular when the child has seen that another film hero is rewarded for aggressive behavior. In short, if kids watch some acts of violence in television, they can become more timorous, more aggressive and insensitive to the violence.